Monday, February 10, 2014

Juicing and other life bits and bobs

I watched a movie documentary called "Fat, Sick and nearly Dead" and it really scared me. I mean,  at the time I was pushing the scale at 300 pounds and had a trip top England on its way, I thought it was time to do something about it. I set a date to start my 30 day juice cleanse - January 2nd (because Jan 1st is just too predictable, and besides I was on a flight back to the US that day). Anyway, I started the cleanse and after 4 days had lost 12 pounds……and then I got sick, really, can't get out of bed except to puke or poop kind of sick. Anything that I could keep down, I figured was a win. I was sick for 3 days and lost another 7 pounds through illness. Here comes the downside - i'd lost my juicing momentum, and with no target date set, I carried on like before, eating junk (albeit organic junk!) and before I knew it, I was at the doctors for a separate issue, weighing a staggering 316.8 pounds! My heart sank to my feet and I just knew that if I didn't do something about this, I'd die before my precious son was old enough to graduate high school.
So, I set myself a new start date February 5th and I still weighed 316.8 on that date. Today, I weigh 303, that's 13.3 pounds in 5 days (it's just after midnight on the 11th when I'm writing this so the 11th doesn't count as a full day yet.
I am walking too, last weekend we took our boy to Disney's Magic Kingdom and he had a blast - I swear I should have had a pedometer, because I was beat when we got home. Then this past weekend we took him to Disney's Animal Kingdom - again, I walked for miles.
I am hoping to get into a regime where I can go for a walk after my night shift ends at 7.15am, and then come home, shower and go to bed…..Once I have built up my walking strength a little, I plan do join cardio classes at a local gym, in fact I already have a 3 month membership on standby that I purchased through Groupon. I just need the all clear from my cardiologist before I lunge head first into something like that.

I am feeling strong, and motivated, and every time I think I am going to eat something I shouldn't I look at a photo of my son and remind myself that not only do I need to make these changes for myself, but also for him. He needs his mum, and I want to be around for a long, long time to come.
My mum tells me that I should take more pride in my appearance, she gets so cross with me for wearing my hair tied up all the time, and I have to remind her, it's Florida, it's darn hot and humid and hair makes my neck sticky. She doesn't like that I don't wear make up either, but since hubby doesn't really like make up, and it makes me feel dirty when i start to sweat with make up on, I only wear it for special occasions, like Girls nights out, or date nights with the hubby. I used to wear it everyday, back in England, but I can't decide if that was to avoid the sound of my mums nagging, or just being a people pleaser.

Anyway, i'll update you periodically on the results of the juice cleanse - and I plan to go onto an 80/20 raw diet after the 30 days, meaning only 20% of my diet can come from meat,fish or dairy and everything else has to be raw fruits, veggies and nuts (easy on the nut intake though). I'll stay on this for a while and eventually as my body gets smaller and healthier, i'll decide, what, if any changes need to be made for me to stay healthy and trim.

My trip to England was fabulous, in case you are wondering, we had an excellent christmas with family and friends, and then my son turned 2 while we were there, so we had a big party for him in a giant kids playhouse. All my friends children were there which made it even more special, I loved watching him play with the children of the people I played with when I wasn't much older than he is. It made me feel a bit old, but it was worth every second.

Nothing in this world could have prepared me for the love I feel as a parent. I thought I knew true love when I got married, and though I still love my hubby as much is not more than the day we wed, he knows that our son is always number 1, in fact he echoes my thoughts, he and I love each other - but we both love our son more. It's a different kind of love. Most parents will understand, it's a "If you asked me to, I would stop the world from spinning for you if I could", or more simply, I would die before I allowed anything to happen to him. When he came into my life, he turned it upside down and inside out, and nothing could have prepared me. I keep photos and video's of him on my phone so if i'm ever out, and start to feel angry at someone for a silly reason, or sad because I can't swing by Popeyes for a Shrimp Po'Boy - I watch the videos and listen to him laugh, and he reminds me that no silly argument over a parking spot is worth it, and no Shrimp Po'boy is worth jeopardizing my health and my goals.

Now that i've made him sound like a little angel, he's not. He has a bad case of the terrible two's. He's into everything, he throws things, has tantrums, tries to smack or bite both me and his dad, i'm not anti 'spanking' but we tried it, and it doesn't work - he laughs, and I can't hit him harder, I mean he's just 2, it should just be a short sharp shock, right? So, we moved to time out, he won't stay in the time out  chair,  he slides out and grabs his toys or whatever is in reach. We take them from him and put him back in the chair and he bangs his head repeatedly and hard against the wall behind him. So we are currently doing a 'guided time out' - he sits in the chair and one of us sits in front of him ensuring he doesn't move, or bang his head. At the end of his two minutes, if he hasn't smacked me in the face (which isn't uncommon in this situation) he has to say he's sorry, and then we hug.

I was spanked as a child and I feared it - my mum would say "If you do that again i'm going to smack you" and I remember thinking "No, I don't want that" and I would stop what I was doing (most of the time anyway). I think our little monster has too much of his daddies DNA hahaha

Anyway. It's late, but i'll be updating again soon, I hope and maybe with some before and after pictures one day!